Notes from Steve

I whacked the top of my head on the way out of the shower today, and it was bleeding.  Not bad, and it didn’t hurt, but I immediately thought of my dad who whacked his head all the time.  For us bald guys - these things are very noticeable.  I told someone a while ago that since I was mainly balding on the back of my head, I don’t worry about it because it’s not on my radar and, therefore, really none of my business.  Same with the cut on my head - I can’t see it, so it doesn’t bother me.*

We got this book called “Dare to Lead” written by Brene Brown last week at LDI.  In the book - she talks about how people and organizations achieve success.  One takeaway (I’ve been saying this lately) is that “nice” is a barrier.  “Nice” allows us to avoid conversations that may need to happen.  Mom used to complain about Dad never taking a position in any argument because he was so opposed to confrontation … “I’m always a shade of gray - never black or white,” he’d say.  “That’s not helpful at all,” she’d say.  She was right.  

Quint Studer used to talk a lot about honesty and the whole “blame and shame” aspect to communication.  “Don’t blame and shame,” he’d say. “There are more compassionate and graceful ways of pointing out errors.” Society is very sensitive in how it receives information as of late - maybe it’s because texting and emails are void of emotions, and everyone reads everything as if it’s meant as a slam.  We need to practice assertive honest communication on one side and take it without freaking out on the other side.  It’s good but not necessarily nice.***

*Honestly, however … if no one else is concerned, I have to wonder what it would take for someone to notice and be concerned**. This is why I am telling everyone about my head wound; if they didn’t have some sort of caring comment, I would be disappointed.   
**a loss of a major limb probably.  
***not a license to be a jerk.