I used to paint. (Lots of pictures of cows.) I asked a friend what ever happened to her painting. She said it’s unframed in the closet. I told her to give it back to me (to reframe and make nice … I may have overlooked this last part when I talked to her). Her and her husband came for a visit last week, and she framed it and was going to give it to me. I told her I wanted her to have it and all I wanted was a decent frame for it. She was happy, and that made me happy.
I think at times our actions are misperceived. I know most of you, and I think that you have loving and genuine hearts. Your actions are rooted with the best of intentions … however, they aren’t always taken that way*. I’m really trying to redo my outlook going forward, armed with this knowledge. There is this group called Better Angels that tries to see middle ground on the political spectrum. There are strong democrats and strong republicans in this group, and their sole mission is to try to understand each other. They typically want the same thing; they’re just coming from different positions and perspectives. We had a discussion at the leader meeting today regarding this. I said “Iowa nice is good, but we need to be assertive and clarify our intentions.” Bottom line, ultimately we are in healthcare to serve (our patients, community, each other) and when assumed otherwise (“that person just doesn’t like me and is destined to make my life miserable”) … we’re usually wrong, that’s probably not their goal. We probably have the same goal.
This next year I am going to worry less about what I assume other people might be thinking. I’m going to work from a loving heart and assume others will as well. I’m going to try and clarify my remarks and make sure people have the whole story (sometimes I’m like that dog on Up - “squirrel!”) before I move on to something else.
Communicate well, with a loving heart.
*There is this commercial for something and the doctor is talking to this gal about her health. She says the word “cancer” and the woman stops listening and is catapulted into her memory of her entire life story. The doc was trying to talk about options and plans. Makes me wonder - when do people stop listening to me?